Updated: Jul 24
Your emotions lead you to react to different situations in certain ways. Without proper management,
your reactions may lead you to speak hurtful words, express physical violence towards an object or even worse… towards a person! It goes without saying that a person who cannot adequately manage their emotions goes through a lot of negative experiences like loneliness, depression, anger or stress.
Emotional management is acquiring the skill to identify and understand your emotions in a healthy way. This one accomplishment has a variety of benefits that impact all areas of your life. A few of those benefits are:
You no longer impulsively react. Instead, you intentionally respond to situations in a constructive manner.
You’re able to reflect on your response to a situation in a way that develops your emotional intelligence.
You’re able to maintain positive relationships in your workspace and personal life.
You increase your ability to resolve conflict without explosive blow-ups.
You become more personable by empathizing with others.
You increase your ability to stay calm under stressful situations.
You experience a less disruptive adaptation to change.
Opening the doors to emotional management skills that work for you is as simple as following these 4 keys:
Awareness of what is happening both outside and inside of you allows you to make rational responses instead of overreacting. Being aware of your surroundings lets you determine things, such as, whether or not this is a matter of life or death or who your reaction could possibly affect or what consequences may result.
When you know this, you improve your ability to effectively assess what is happening inside of you with your feelings. Are you overly excited or anxious? Frustrated or feeling disappointed? Annoyed or overwhelmed? Are you nervous or feel violated? Is your emotional reaction in line with the severity or calmness of the situation? Awareness helps you to intentionally respond instead of impulsively reacting to situations. Awareness helps you assess what your feelings are actually trying to tell you.
2. Reflect on How You Respond to Situations
Remember, emotional management skills also allow you to be aware of what others are feeling. Thinking back on how you responded to a particular situation may point out things that you might have missed in the heat of the moment. You might have missed how your choice of words hurt someone else or notice that you tend to feel insecure when you are under pressure.
Reflection not only shows you your personal areas of improvement, but it also shows you your strong points which helps you to be more confident in some areas of your life. You can then identify which strategies work best for you when you are panicking or how to express your anger about something without offending anyone.
3. Acknowledge Your Emotions
Ignoring your “bad” emotions is a form of self-sabotage because you miss an opportunity to learn something about yourself. Everything happens for a reason; likewise, every emotion is felt for a reason. Acknowledging your anxiety, depression, anger or frustration does not mean that you are allowing those emotions to control your reaction. Instead, you are allowing yourself to discover why you feel that way.
Knowing why you feel a certain way allows you to identify your likes and dislikes, your comfort zone, your limits and so forth. Acknowledging all of your emotions allows you to build character and principles that properly represent you. As a result, you, as an individual, are able to interact with others with assertion and confidence.
4. Forgive Your Emotional Triggers
In some cases, we inappropriately react to situations because of a past pain. This pain could be betrayal from a friend, divorce, deep-rooted traumas, or any negative experience. A trigger of this emotion could result in you acting rightfully IN the emotion but TO the wrong situation.
This may be because you haven’t forgiven the person or thing which caused you that pain. You may be holding a grudge (or even plotting your revenge) which causes you to misdirect your emotions and response to anything that is a trigger. A trigger could be a certain smell, a certain feeling, a color or a sound. It can be a phrase, a person, or a name. A trigger is anything that reminds you of your pain, but the majority of the time, this happens subconsciously.
Forgiving doesn’t dismiss the perpetrator from the pain they caused you, but the point of forgiveness is to heal yourself. Forgiving means letting go, acknowledging what happened but choosing to continue life without it as opposed to dragging your emotions of pain around. You’re able to form healthier relationships that aren’t contaminated by past pain.
In all the steps you take towards emotional management, remember that you are working towards identifying and understanding your own emotions in a way that allows you to decrease your stress and increase your ability to thrive in life’s moments.
Bonus: Another way to improve your emotional management skills is to practice self-love. Know that you are worthy of experiencing positive emotions on a consistent basis.
To help you do that, download a FREE sample of Affirmations For Self-Worth by clicking here.
If you need more in depth guidance to increase your clarity around why you’re feeling what you’re feeling, then book a complimentary consultation call here.
Blessings & Abundance
Your Resident Mindset Coach,